Apple bans fart apps, happiness and fun on the Apple Watch

Fart apps and smartwatches are a perfect match and everyone knows it. It’s a whoopie cushion that can be set off remotely. There’s nothing that isn’t funny about that. Sadly, Apple disagrees wholefartedly. According to them, that kind of purile hooliganism has no place on such a refined, classy device.

Apple’s unwillingness to allow such bacchanalia on their device was discovered through the rejection of the Fart Watch app which, helpfully, does exactly what the name suggests. It copped the following, rather deadpan response from Apple, which was reported by Cult of Mac.

2.11 — Apps that duplicate Apps already in the App Store may be rejected, particularly if there are many of them, such as fart, burp, flashlight, and Kama Sutra Apps

8.1 — Apps must comply with all terms and conditions explained in the Guidelines for Using Apple Trademarks and Copyrights and the Apple Trademark List

2.11 Details

We noticed that your Apple Watch app is primarily a fart app. We do not accept fart apps on Apple Watch.

Look, the countdown until someone cracks the Watch API wide open and creates a jailbreak is already running. After that, the fart apps and long distance trolling will commence in earnest with sideloaded apps aplenty but until then you’ll just have to hold it in.